Saturday, October 08, 2005

Greatest Movie Ever Made To Be Made

I hate when people say "Hollywood has run out of ideas." Apparently, such people are unaware of this film, which will no doubt be the best movie ever made. If you're too lazy to click the link, then you should at least know that this film, starring Samuel L. Jackson, is called "Snakes on a Plane."

Hollywood out of ideas? Don't make me laugh! Sure, there have been movies about snakes. And yes, movies about planes. But snakes on a plane? If they gave a Nobel Prize for movies instead of for stupid shit like "bimology" or whatever the fuck that is, then yes, this would win a Nobel Prize.

This is brilliant simplicity: you can just look at the title and know, instantly, not only what the film is about, but virtually everything that happens in it.

Still, maybe it could be clearer. Like, how many snakes are there? What kind of plane is it? And will the snakes find love? I guess we'll have to wait for the sequel, "Snakes on a Plane on a Date," to find out.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love "Snakes on a Plane"! The best movie to come out since "Scorpions on a Boat"! And it is most certainly better than "Gila monsters on a hot-air balloon"! But come on, can it really be as good as "Grizzly Bears on a Dirigible"? I think not.

1:19 AM  
Anonymous Tangella said...

At least it might be fun to see the snakes come down with the oxygen masks... if you happen to be in one of those moods where you go to a movie to see a cow get sucked up by a twister.

11:26 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oooh, I don't like movies where cows are sucked up by twisters. In fact, every time there is a movie featuring a cow, it usually ends with the cow dying. In "Jurassic Park" the cow becomes dinner for velociraptors. In "Apocalypse Now," the cow (bull) loses his head to the natives. Then there's "Meet the Feebles," where the cow has S&M gear around her udder and attacks everyone in a violent spree with a machine gun. I tell you, cows get no respect. Instead people just "milk" them for shock value. (yuk yuk...) P.S. don't even get me started on the scene of the cow swimming underwater in "The Poseidon Adventure."

7:04 PM  
Anonymous tangella said...

I'd love to see a cow go John Woo on a bunch of people with a machine gun.

11:17 PM  

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